Planning a wedding is a wonderful experience, but it is also complex. In this article, I have gathered the most common mistakes I have witnessed during my time as a wedding planner—such as exceeding the set budget, failing to have a “Plan B” for bad weather, stressing too much over trying to control everything, and arriving at the big day exhausted, all of which can be avoided with a critical eye and good organization. Let’s dive right in (metaphorically speaking) to this entertaining roundup of disasters!
#1 Starting too late (or too early) without a clear plan
So called “express weddings”, those organized in six months or less—are increasingly common, much to the delight of us wedding planners. At the other end of the spectrum are weddings planned up to three years in advance, very early indeed. Both scenarios come with potential pitfalls. In the first case, there is a risk of mounting stress and delays (especially without a precise timeline); in the second, vendors may be unwilling to commit so far in advance or unable to calculate the cost of their services for a date more than two years away.
So, when it comes to wedding planning, where should you start? Personally, I create a schedule with deadlines for each couple, breaking down the services into broad categories and prioritizing them. This way, the couple always knows the right pace to maintain and what the next step will be.
#2 Underestimating the actual budget
Having a general idea of your total budget is certainly a must; underestimating the actual costs can be a real problem. The initial quote you receive from suppliers is often too optimistic. You need to be on the lookout for all hidden costs, extras, VAT, and all those other unclear items in the contract.
Other times, however, it’s technical and logistical issues that drive up prices. For example, holding the reception in a location far from the kitchen (and believe me, this isn’t uncommon when it comes to very large wedding venues) almost certainly entails the additional cost of a mobile kitchen. If you decide to make use of all the spaces at the venue to enjoy different settings at different points during the wedding, the number of sound systems will also increase, along with the associated cost. And so on… Having a wedding planner by your side during this important process doesn’t necessarily mean higher costs; rather, it’s a way to optimize your budget to get better services and, above all, avoid unpleasant surprises.
#3 Delegating too much (or to people who lack experience)
How many times have I heard things like, “I don’t need a wedding planner because we have a big family and we all help each other out,” or “My sister-in-law is helping me with the decorations,” and if that weren’t enough, “My brother can be the DJ, he does it as a hobby, but he’s really good at it.” How many times have I heard things like that? Way too many! It’s wonderful to have friends and family involved, because a wedding is a time of shared joy, and this is also a way to show support and affection. However, be careful not to delegate more than you should, relatives and friends can help, but sometimes it can backfire.
Here are some tasks you can safely delegate to make your family and friends feel involved:
- help you choose clothes and accessories
- Invite them to the wedding menu tasting (make sure there’s no extra charge)
- Choose bridesmaids and groomsmen who will help you on your wedding day
- Rehearse the ceremony a few days before the wedding (highly recommended)
Leave everything else to a professional—and, if possible, under the supervision of a wedding planner.
#4 Thinking that “do-it-yourself” means saving money
Don’t completely hand over a service to someone who does it as a hobby and isn’t a professional. It might seem like you’re saving money, but you could end up in a mess—and I don’t think that’s what you want on your big day. Like that time when the amateur photographer friend had a technical problem with his camera. The result? The couple ended up without any photos on their wedding day. A professional photographer knows that a single camera isn’t enough, which is why they have at least two—especially when just one photographer is covering the event. These incidents are rare, but they can happen even to professionals, let alone to someone who isn’t in the business. Fortunately (but unfortunately for them), the couple in question wasn’t one of my clients, nor were they working with any other wedding planners. They had simply decided they didn’t need one.
#5 Not having a “Plan B”
25% of couples complain that the “Plan B” offered by wedding venues was not convincing. These are not mere impressions but statistical data updated as of 2025. This means the issue is still quite concerning. A bad, rainy day can ruin all your fondest dreams, taking you “from the heights to the depths” in an instant. It is therefore clear how important it is to book a venue with compelling alternatives that measure up to the initial proposal—that is, Plan A.
Be sure to bring accessories such as umbrellas (preferably transparent or, at most, white) and appropriate footwear. Check to see if the venue has umbrellas, tents, canopies, and heaters that you can use in case of cold weather. If it doesn’t, find out about rental options. In these cases as well, tensile structures can come to our rescue, if conditions allow, but don’t underestimate the cost, because they’re by no means cheap. Finally, while you’re at it, ask the makeup artist and hairstylist to apply makeup and style your hair so that it’s “waterproof”—resistant to rain and, why not, even a few tears of emotion.
#6 Copying everything from Pinterest without adapting it
Every wedding is unique, and not everything you see online works—and, above all, it’s not realistic. Let me tell you about this story that happened to a colleague of mine: a lavender-themed wedding. The flowers arrived (they were beautiful!), but the bride complained because the shade wasn’t exactly the same as in the images shared on Pinterest. It seems obvious to me that this goes way beyond common sense, especially since online images are often (and this was one of those cases) edited with filters to make the colors more vibrant. Furthermore, nature is ever-changing; these aren’t mass-produced items, and there will never be two flowers in the world that are completely identical.
But even if it were possible to simply copy and paste from the online world into reality, I’ll tell you right now that it wouldn’t be possible for two reasons. The first is that every creation is protected by copyright, so theoretically it wouldn’t be possible to copy it, only to draw inspiration from it. The second is that even if one wanted to recreate something as realistically as possible, the florist, artist, or graphic designer tasked with this thankless job will always have their own style, their own way of creating a floral arrangement or a handcrafted product, and it can never be perfectly identical no matter how hard they try, simply because they are a different person.
Also, I personally advise against taking things you find randomly on the internet and trying to replicate them as closely as possible. Instead, try to create something completely personalized and unique, something that reflects who you are. You can certainly gather ideas and inspiration both online and offline (there are many specialized magazines to draw from), and once you have this material, if possible, seek advice from a wedding designer or directly from the individual vendors in their respective areas of expertise (so invitations from the graphic designer, flowers from the floral designer, decorations from the caterer or third-party vendors, etc.). I should point out, however, that in this case, there won’t be an expert point of contact who has a complete vision of your wedding or in-depth knowledge of design, style, material combinations, colors, and so on. In any case, don’t ask for a “copy-and-paste” solution, use the references only to better communicate your tastes; the professional will then work to interpret them. As they say, a picture is worth a thousand words!
#7 Don’t enjoy the process
I’ll tell you what I tell my couples (especially those who are particularly anxious or who want to have everything under control): don’t stress out if you see a candle that’s gone out or a slightly wilted flower during the wedding (maybe because it’s too hot or because of direct air conditioning), it’s normal for there to be a few unexpected hiccups (like that time a best man was an hour late because his five-year-old daughter got sick on the way, delaying the start of the ceremony). These are all things that can happen because this isn’t a movie you’re watching at the theater, it’s real life, which is full of unexpected twists and turns. Of course, having a professional by your side and a whole team of collaborative, knowledgeable vendors gives you greater peace of mind. In any case, don’t let the unexpected ruin your wedding day (or the planning process either); enjoy the journey, and if something doesn’t go exactly as you’d like, take it in stride, marriage has a deeper meaning, so it’s best to view it from that perspective.
App yes or no?
I don’t want to be the kind of person who bases their choices and judgments on preconceptions, which is why, before writing this paragraph, I looked into some wedding planning apps, and I have to say that some of them aren’t half bad. So if you really don’t have a wedding planner to help you organize your wedding, using an app can be helpful. Generally, these apps have a section for to-do lists, one for finding vendors, one for budgeting, one for seating arrangements, and one for creating a wedding website. I’m not saying they’re poorly designed, but they are incomplete, or perhaps it would be better to say they’re too general.
Let me explain: the section on “things to do” throws everything into the mix, even things that aren’t relevant, for example, attending the premarital course at your parish, even for those who aren’t religious and won’t be having a religious wedding. It doesn’t take into account the order of subjective importance for the couple but only the chronological order (and even that is debatable), and it doesn’t include (at least for now) reminders; to view and check off the various tasks, you have to log in to your profile. Budget tracking is perhaps the feature I found most lacking; it doesn’t take into account the proportion of the initial budget, the number of guests, the different types of services, or even price differences based on geographic area and season. I honestly don’t understand what basis they used to determine that wedding music should cost €150.
The website is certainly useful, but it’s already preset; you can only customize it slightly, with just a few graphic options to choose from, none of which are unique or consistent with the rest of the brand’s visual identity. Not to mention the table layout, which doesn’t take the venue’s floor plan into account, and the selection of vendors, who you don’t know, so let’s just hope for the best. But be careful—I don’t want to demonize this tool. I’ll say it again: it’s not bad if you don’t have a professional guiding you, and it’s still a good starting point for those who, understandably, don’t have in-depth knowledge of the subject.
Many couples rely on apps to manage their wedding planning, but often these aren’t enough. The expertise of a professional is something else entirely, and believe me, I’m not just saying this because I’m biased—I think it’s true in this field just as it is in all others: technology helps, but it doesn’t replace the real thing. It certainly doesn’t replace the quality of a premium service.
A wedding planner’s experience and constant presence truly make a difference, starting with a genuine understanding of the industry, the latest trends, and market conditions (the real ones, not what vendors post on websites or portals just to attract new leads). Treating an event, which, by definition, is one-of-a-kind because (listen carefully) every person is unique, just as every couple is, as if it were just another run-of-the-mill event is a mistake. It’s not an annual event that repeats itself year after year, same location, same time of year, same program (more or less, with a few new touches), with different editions like trade shows, sporting events, or conferences for doctors or accountants… Of course, there are constants, a framework, so to speak, within which to operate: it’s a private, romantic event where love is celebrated, and where people eat, laugh, and joke. But within this framework, the picture will always be different, unique, and one-of-a-kind, just like you are.
The Bonus Mistake: Underestimating the Table Layout
Arranging the seating for a wedding is a much more delicate process than it seems. The app helps with this, too, but only to a limited extent. Personally, I prefer to provide my couples with a file detailing the guest seating arrangement, cross-referenced with the venue floor plan, table types, catering requirements, and Plan A and Plan B options, which are almost always different. For example, outdoors there might be space for a large imperial-style table, while indoors it might only be possible to set up round tables, or two imperial-style tables, and so on… Alternatively, for those who want to integrate digital invitations, we’ve set up (together with my unbeatable team) a fully customizable website that also includes a table-planning feature, allowing guests to directly confirm their attendance at the event along with any specific requests regarding food, accommodations, and so on.
Anyway, logistics aside, the real challenge for engaged couples lies in deciding where to seat whom and with which other guests. Panic. A wedding planner can only help you to a certain extent with this, because only you know who you want to invite and how you want to arrange the tables. Here’s my advice:
- First of all, make a distinction between family (and each person’s family) and friends,
- Pair people who might get along, and I’d add that they should be roughly the same age,
- Don’t seat someone at a table where they don’t know anyone at all (I personally would also avoid the singles’ table),
- Please set up a kids’ table (with activity leaders on hand) if there are at least ten children, aged roughly between 6 and 10.
Planning a successful wedding is no small feat, and being able to enjoy the process amid the hectic pace of the 21st century is perhaps even more difficult. In my opinion, getting help (whether for everything or just part of it) is always the best solution, but only if you’re working with a true professional. If you’re still in the very early stages and trying to figure things out, I have something here that can help you: a practical guide so you don’t miss a single step. Download my free PDF planner: The Bride’s Planner will help you organize everything with greater peace of mind by clarifying where to start and how to make sure you don’t forget anything. That’s exactly what my job is: to help you avoid anything that might complicate your life. .
If you want to plan a wedding with more peace of mind and less stress, would you like to talk about it?
don't happen by chance:
they have to be planned.
